So we tend not to be aware of being guilty of scapegoating (though I think we’re all quite well aware of being scapegoated)â€¦how do we become more aware of being guilty? Or maybe I’ll answer my own question by way of another one â€“ are we tempted to scapegoat when we’ve been on the receiving end of it? Like when we’ve been hurt by a friend, rejected or slandered in some wayâ€¦is that just our reflex, to return the favour?
Reflex is an accurate description of our reciprocal-aggression habit. We payback without thinking. But of course the permutations of our "payback" are countless. A friend may have hurt us but because we desire the friendship, for what ever reason, we "scapegoat" in any number of unpredictable directions.
To live a limpid life, free from tit-for-tat hostility is what we are meant for. But oh so hard. We need models.