http://growmercy.org/2007/03/26/beneficent-wind/ Tue, 06 Jan 2009 09:34:18 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.6.3 http://growmercy.org/2007/03/26/beneficent-wind/#comment-3356 S. Thomas Tue, 27 Mar 2007 22:07:15 +0000 http://growmercy.org/2007/03/26/beneficent-wind/#comment-3356 Connie, sounds to me like yours is a new kind of conversion. Thomas Merton called 'conversatio morum,' that is, 'being open to conversion,' the most mysterious vow. Being obedient to being open maybe the most stable thing we can do. Connie, sounds to me like yours is a new kind of conversion.
Thomas Merton called ‘conversatio morum,’ that is, ‘being open to conversion,’ the most mysterious vow. Being obedient to being open maybe the most stable thing we can do.

]]> http://growmercy.org/2007/03/26/beneficent-wind/#comment-3298 connie Tue, 27 Mar 2007 15:28:54 +0000 http://growmercy.org/2007/03/26/beneficent-wind/#comment-3298 I'm not stable, open to conversion or obedient either, at least not anymore, and not anywhere near as much as you are—but strangely I hardly value those things anymore. I was all those things for many, many years, and I now wish I’d been much less that way. We shared an hour with my non-religious, permissive, rough-around-the-edges former brother-in-law last night, and I was struck by my level of regret, and his complete absence of regret, and the hours of carefree laughter me and my kids missed out on, and the burdens my children carry that his don’t—all of which is directly related to my being stable and obedient and afraid to be my own person. Maybe it’s a midlife crisis, or maybe it’s new kind of conversion, but I’m embracing being my own person now, unstable and disobedient, and it feels freer, holier, infinitely more right. I’m not stable, open to conversion or obedient either, at least not anymore, and not anywhere near as much as you are—but strangely I hardly value those things anymore. I was all those things for many, many years, and I now wish I’d been much less that way. We shared an hour with my non-religious, permissive, rough-around-the-edges former brother-in-law last night, and I was struck by my level of regret, and his complete absence of regret, and the hours of carefree laughter me and my kids missed out on, and the burdens my children carry that his don’t—all of which is directly related to my being stable and obedient and afraid to be my own person. Maybe it’s a midlife crisis, or maybe it’s new kind of conversion, but I’m embracing being my own person now, unstable and disobedient, and it feels freer, holier, infinitely more right.

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